Crashburn's Tunnel of Life

Who am I?

* 13th March * Eldest * Muslim * Pasir Ris, Singapore * NIE * Silat * One of the finest God's creations in the face of the Earth... Hehehe.. ;p The ever changing weather is my confidant... Only "IT" can truly understand who I am and what I am in this evolving world.. Certainly searching for a "surgeon" who can perform an excellent transplant to my heart... heart's aching... heart's controlling the mind... *

My Tunnel

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

At this point of time, I am totally feeling shity and sucky!!
I donno why human beings (including me) can be so such hypocrites... and liars!!

I donno why Bluey just ignored my call and everythg abt me... I donno if I really did something that grave a mistake that she should do this to me...
Read her yushann blog and yeah... finally I can see that truth in her words.. for a very long time...
And to tell me she didn't love him...when in fact she did and will still do lah! Haha.. I know it does not concern me and me too was a hypocrite and liar too.. at sopme point of time.. we, human beings all do... but yah.. it's not somthing that i am feeling angry or sad reading her confession to her Bear, but yah... feel a bit betrayed by her own words though... Haha.. donno what I am crapping all about!
And to think she yelled " Bloody Hell" to me! What's tht for?! Betrayed by her own words and vows...and oath to cleanse herself from having an sense of hatred and tht kind of thingy...
I donno why she needs to ignore me... and do this to me..for all the concern and care I have given her as a fren..
Just like what u have said... I also have enuff of ur empty and vows to change urself and cleanse urself from any form of hatred... and to think I thought u really have changed and mean whatever u said... Demi allah, I never hate u or have any grudges against u.. U are the master of ur own misery.... jgn salahkan orang lain!
Whatever it is, ur always in my doa.. and I do prayed that ur wound will be healed...

Chipsmore.. I donno what's happening to u... all those silence and all those indifference... Please don worry, I am not expecting or hoping any for of feelings from u... I still don understand why u still "ignored" me.. is it wrong to still be friends?! I have always hope and prayed that u will be with ur loved ones.. as long as ur happy, I am also happy for u .. But ur silence is so deafening... it is becoming from bad to worse... U have changed... a lot! Perhaps, I should have changed too... coz without me realising... the indifference and coldness that u inflict onto me... made me changed so much that I care no hoots of any kind of feelings to anyone... For now, I guess, the only reason I am thriving and living for in this competitive and hypocrite world is because of Allah, and my family...

A lot of things have happened to me... changes do take place... if allah swt sees that as a form of escapism for me, I will accept it with great redha and relief.. insyaallah...
All i hope I don have to hurt any other parties for these changes...

Daisy... silences too?! How hv u been? I do hope that u're in great health with ur loved ones.. I hope u'll be happy with ur current boyfriend.. I prayed for the best of u... Hope ur attachment is going on fine for u..

To all.. do take care...

CrAsHbUrN was in @ 2:03 PM